As you know, this month of December carries so many poignant memories for me–and for my girls, too.
Honestly, I generally don’t like to remember December 13th. It’s a day laden with heavy memory, a marker of grief. This year, though, that day marked the tenth anniversary of Richard’s transition–of “our” transition–and I wanted to commemorate him.
I had about thirty of our close family members and friends come over for a candle lighting that evening, and it was beautiful.
The thing that touched my heart most deeply was the presence of my grandchildren in the remembrance circle.
I sat in our big chair with two-year-old Kennedy playing at my feet and with the “big boys” nestled in on either side of me, each holding their own candle and listening intently to each person as we made our way around the circle and shared our memories of Richard.
I realized that this was why this evening was important to me.
No matter how much time passes, we long for our children’s children to know the ones that died too early. We want them to know their lineage–especially those great men and women who gave so much.
I want my grandsons and granddaughters to know that their grandfather Richard was a man with a great heart. The thread of stories told that evening all pointed to this gentle, loving, and kind man–and his extraordinary impact built upon the many small ways he showed up big. The boys were all ears, as they could see their grandpa through the eyes of the people closest to him.
And, as the circle came around to Caden and Kayson, seven years and five years old, they claimed their grandfather with pride as they said their name followed by, “that’s my Grandpa Richard.”
As tears flowed, I can’t tell you how much this warmed my heart and soul, and I peeled back yet another layer of healing as my deepest wound has been the longing for my grandchildren, especially the boys, to know Richard.
If you have lost someone you love, please consider doing this for your family. It’s such a special connection.
It’s so incredibly honoring to bring family and friends together in the celebration of life–and no less special ten years later.
I hope your holidays have been filled with love.
Treasure the gifts of life and love,