What Now? Reinventing life one question at a time… Do I create my reality? & What is my agreement with reality?
It is our inner world that affects our outer world.
Recently, I’ve been revisiting some of Richard’s tapes as well as one of his early mentors in his Ph.D. program, Dr. George Pransky, as they discuss the principles of “Psychology of Mind.” They call it P.O.M. It changes peoples lives because it teaches how to access our mental health with a deeper understanding. These principles certainly altered our course personally and professionally, and it was the starting point for all of our work in the Don’t Sweat series as well as Richard’s early books on happiness.
One big question in reinventing life this week is:
Do I create my own reality?
What Now? Reinventing Life One Question at a Time: What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up? Living Passionately Powered by Purpose
Are you still unable to truly answer that question you’ve been asking yourself since Kindergarten, “What do I want to be when I grow up?”
Well, you’re not alone if you feel unfulfilled in your day-to-day life because only one percent of the population has dared to ask, “What is my life purpose?”
Lit From Within With the Peace of Integrity
I’ve been sitting still and quiet waiting to be inspired to bring the topic of integrity to life for you. It’s 4 a.m. and there are rats scurrying around in my attic—my early morning company. They sound like they are having a party and even, Bear, my golden retriever looks at me with his big brown eyes that say, “Really?” I figure the rat is a totem that has showed up for some reason. (At least that's how I try to make peace with them while I work on a plan to relocate them.) For the Hindus, the rat represents prudence and foresight. So I keep these clever critters in mind as I forge ahead on the topic of Integrity. Here it goes…
If a guy hears that question, “What are your intentions?” immediately we think of a father and daughter scenario where the guy has his hands in his pockets, anxiously shifting his weight side to side while he waits for his date. I remember a time in high school when a baseball player who was already in college came to our door to pick me up for a date. My dad took one look at him and decided he was too old for me. He asked him the question, “What are your intentions with my daughter, young man?” (By the way, this was a first and only date and the meaning of my dad’s question was clearly a warning.) The guy uneasily replied, “I guess my intention, sir, is to have your daughter home by 11 o’clock, as you say.” My dad said, “Good, son, I’ll be waiting.”
Intention is a powerful thing and “there are many a road that have been paved with good intentions.” And, many a road that remains unchartered territory without them.
Reflecting on this past year, it's been a big growth year, and can you believe how fast it flew by? (That's a nice way to say it has been challenging alongside receiving many blessings.) However challenging it might be, it is not insurmountable. There have been births in the family and losses. There have been graduations and new beginnings. There are aging parents and grandchildren growing into bigger shoes.
I’ve been asking spirit to guide me to “what’s next?” in my meditation practice. My inner wisdom has told me that I need to deepen my practice, and as spirit often speaks through others, I found a local Transcendental Meditation teacher through a dear friend who had just completed a class.
Last spring while on a speaking tour with Kim Serafini and Annette Symn, I was having a conversation with an Executive Business woman from Australia and she made the comment that in the business world, your professional life is over at 50. My immediate reaction was perhaps naive as I said: Are you kidding? That’s not the story for me.
I was on a flight home from L.A. and I sat down next to a really nice couple. A woman just a few years older than myself at the time, around 5o years of age, smiled and we began chatting. She shared with me her story that she had basically stayed home raising her family for the past decade or so. She and her husband were financially secure and didn’t need the extra income.
My exercise regime is focused on core strength. I just had my 51st birthday, and without some concerted effort I can definitely see some “muffin top” happening. Some of that is just unavoidable and has more to do with a slowing metabolism and a desire to let loose and have some fun and celebration now and then. (At least, five extra pounds of fun.) I may allow my pendulum to swing a short while to the left but, as I swing back to the middle, I’m all about facing the next bar of fitness—no matter what age I am, and I love the hour I spend doing that at my local Nextbarre studio.
You’ve probably noticed some of my more passionate posts lately on behalf of women. As an American Heart Association spokesperson, I want to help increase awareness that heart disease is the #1 killer of women. One out of three women will die from heart disease and it’s because we don’t listen to the early signs of detection. Why is that? My mom recently had a minor heart attack. She woke up in the middle of the night feeling like an elephant was sitting on her chest. She didn’t go back to sleep, but she didn’t go to the hospital right away either. At about 2 p.m. the next day, she spoke to my niece who is in medical school studying to be a naturopath.
Truth is, beautiful people don’t just happen. There are two ways to see beauty. I can look at something from the outside as an object, or I can see the essence of beauty that comes from the inside-out - the soul of beauty. Essence is something far more reflective and intangible but clearly present in the energy of all living things.
Coming off The Truth Event tour with my good friends, Aussie speakers Kim Serefini and Annette Symn, I was struck by a question Annette would ask in the entrepreneur business building portion of her talk, “How many of you would like to make a lot of money?” Even more striking was the hesitancy people had in raising their hands. In each event, only one or two people would raise their hands when asked this question. Why?
Let’s pretend for a moment that we are having a glass of wine together, and we are in circle of women who have lost the man in our lives. We are modern day widows. We find ourselves on this unexpected sovereign journey that we are not very sure of, and we step forward not because we want to, but because we have to.
When Carolyn Moor asked me to write this column for Modern Widows Club, I hesitated momentarily, as anyone might. I thought about what a taboo subject our feminine sexuality can be especially to “the good girls.”
One of the things that hits us the hardest as widows is the fact that we were in a marriage, coupled, and now find ourselves navigating the murky waters of what it means to be “single.” Even our friendships that once seemed safe in our couple’s world now feel awkward and strained as we are seen differently as a “single” woman. The only rule there is in the process of healing is that there are no rules! There is nothing to guide you but your heart and what you feel is the very best choice you can make to heal. You are, after all, the surviving spouse. Here are a few guidelines I would suggest you reflect on as you begin to discern your next moves as a modern widow and single woman.
Woman to Woman Series: When is the right time to begin dating after the loss of a partner or spouse? No one can answer this question for you. However, there are a few preceding questions that will help you know if you are ready to begin dating and what kind of relationship you want.